It’s not been a walk in the park

I think Joe has mentioned that I have not had an easy time so far in this pregnancy.  The nausea was awful, but it has gotten better.  I’m still waiting for that blissful second trimester time, now that I’m almost 5 months along, but I don’t think that will be in the cards for me.  I am still getting sick occasionally and have a prescription for nausea to help keep that at bay.

But what’s been most difficult are the few scares that we have had.  Joe wrote about Friday, the 13^th in April.  Well, a couple weeks ago, I had a little more spotting.  It wasn’t as bad as the first time, and this time I knew what was going on and that there wasn’t too much to be worried about as far as the babies were concerned.  But it’s still so scary because it’s still a sign that not everything is absolutely perfect.

This time I had an even better understanding of what might be happening.  At the ultrasound, the doctor found that the placenta of our baby girl is pretty close to my cervix. This makes it much more likely to have bleeding and it’s something they need to keep a pretty close eye on.  In fact, if the placenta moves over the cervix, I will most likely be put on some sort of bed rest, which I dread more than anything.

Sometimes it feels really unfair.  We had to go through so much just to get pregnant. Shouldn’t I get a free pass to an easy pregnancy?  But I know it doesn’t work that way, so I know I just need to do whatever is needed to make sure these babies that we have worked so hard for stay safe and sound for many more weeks.

I have to really watch how much activity I have each day. I can’t really even go for walks.  Trying to run the errands that we need to do to prepare for the babies is exhausting and makes me a little nervous. It’s hard having that worry in the back of my head all the time (if you know me, you know I don’t need any help with worrying), and I really wish I was able to do more.  But once again, Joe has shown how amazing he is. He helps out a lot around the house and does what he can to help me feel more comfortable. He has been patient whenever I don’t feel well and helps me feel calmer when the tears can’t be stopped. I don’t know what I would do without him!